Second world problems

The many forms of It

The more we identify ourselves – culturally, politically, and otherwise –  the more we are either recognised or discriminated against. But when push comes down to the stove, it comes down to two kinds: Those who have It and those who don’t.

And yes, I meant stove – as in, when things actually matter: Who gets to eat, and who gets to stay warm. Maybe this connects to the “haves and have-nots” idea of the Marxist theory. Now, there are chances to assume It represents money here – because of the socio-economic conditioning. You wouldn’t be wrong. Money seems to be the common factor that helped the subject in the following examples achieve the desired object. Pun intended.  

She bought a 3 BHK apartment

He went on a Eurotrip 

They have money 

On the other hand, have you read Toni Morrison’s The Bluest Eye? The author explores how systemic racism and internalized oppression shape our desires and destroy our sense of self – through a young Black girl named Pecola, who longs for blue eyes, believing beauty only belongs to whiteness. It can also be race, gender, caste, ethnicity, religion – identities we are born into or forced to carry. They influence whether we fall under the deserving or the undeserving kind.

For some, It is still food, water, and shelter – basic necessities that remain out of reach. And for others, It looks like attention, validation, and pampering. But for both, money plays a key role in not only influencing our access to It but also helping to overlook our identities. For better or worse, money can shape who gets to have It; in every form it takes. 

Get your hot beverage. Or cold.

This essay could be a narrative about you. Maybe you will resonate with my thoughts.

Or not. 

Our happiness

If we were to categorise people based on happiness, how do we determine if someone is happy? The question struck my mind, keeping it busy to find an answer - within and outside. Before I found a solid reason, I realised an individual’s happiness is only temporary. By the time we are ready to classify someone as happy, their happiness index might have already shifted.

Emotions like anger, fear, guilt, and others, in general, are short lived. If we had a penny for everytime we heard “This too shall pass!”, we probably wouldn’t be laughing at our superior’s jokes. Where happiness stands out among emotions is in its rarity and its brevity – sometimes lasting no longer than a blink of an eye. The rarity and brevity of happiness make people doubt the feeling rather than enjoy it. 

Happiness comes in moments. It is in its nature to fleet. Anyone who has ever tried to make happiness last knows it is as futile as clasping your hands to trap air. Yet, that has never stopped anyone from pursuing happiness. Why? Because happiness has shown us its potential. The warm feeling we get everytime we achieve our milestones – graduating with a degree, securing a job, marrying your sweetheart. Oh please, who am I kidding!

• Shopping even when your budget says no

• Ordering dinner even when you have food at home

• Devouring a tub of ice cream    

Can happiness be an It? Happiness is the byproduct of fulfilling a desire — be it big or small. If you ended up moral policing yourself, thinking these are guilty pleasures and not happiness per se, well, think again. Society has automated us into feeling guilt, especially when one does something for the self. On the contrary, we do feel a speck of happiness when we consume. But here’s the catch: after the shopping spree, after the ice cream, after the moment of indulgence, what happens next?

You set your eyes on something else that will help you survive another day in life. 

Aren’t we all in the pursuit of happiness? 

Materialists' manifesto

Materialism, in terms of culture or economy, is the focus on accumulating material possessions, often placing them above other values. In that case, are we materialists? 

Does adding clothes to our wardrobe to feel good mean that we focus on accumulating material possessions? So what if we are materialists? What is the dire need of society to label everyone and everything?

Now, I don’t want to put myself in a little box just because of the current circumstances. Let’s say that I am excited for little things in my life. Fortunately or unfortunately, the little things here might be materials that do not hold any value to the rest of the world in the sands of time. The act of buying a recliner does not matter to someone who already has it. Do you catch my drift? It all boils down to ‘who has It? And who doesn’t?’ But… the act of buying a recliner holds an immense value in my life’s timeline.    

Welcome to Second World Problems! Isn’t it ironic, though, to call ourselves ‘Second World’? Borrowing a Cold War geopolitics term to define our emotional condition. We are not poor. We are not rich. We are not communists. We are not capitalists. Hell – we are not even bourgeois. Yes, we are the people who have It and don’t – stuck somewhere in the middle! We don’t have what the people above us have, and we have what the people below us don’t. The constant comparison stems from insecurity: Either the peers’ or the self’s. And those insecurities paved the way for the establishment of certain metrics that we are expected to meet: 

An education with a professional degree 

A high-paying job 

A roof above us 

Pieces of land next to us 

A spouse behind us 

And kids around us

From the moment a life is born, it’s thrown into a rat race. There isn’t a finish line for this race, and it ends right after its last breath.  If you are greedy enough, you pass your unfinished milestones on to the next generation, making their lives become an extension of your own failures. Because free will and society are both constructed myths. Parents, teachers, relatives, and others decide what you might need for the most part of your life — because it’s their white man’s burden. You get to choose where you want to study as long as they decide what you have to study. Freedom comes at the cost of slavery.

The Myth of Sisyphus

To maintain order, society has a set of rules. 

And to maintain our sanity, we have a set of principles…based on what we aspire to have. 

A job fixes financial problems. 

A marriage solves loneliness.

Socialising numbs the pain. 

And a baby saves the marriage.

Where do you fall? Or yet another sheep following the herd only to fall off the cliff? The pursuit of it is never-ending. The moment you achieve it; there will be another one — just like Sisyphus’ eternal torment. 

Do you get it? Neither do I. 

Yours truly